Full Blog Transparency: Day 217

NES StarTropics fan art by Robert Chapman

This picture is coming along really nicely! I also got a fantastic idea, though I’m not sure if I can fully realize the idea properly. I want to take some in-game NES screen shots and paint those up. I have no idea if they’ll end up looking okay, but it would be fun. Here’s the idea proper; start painting a screen and for the first day or so, once I post it, it might not be fully apparent what game it’s from. After a few days though it would click for some people, I’m sure. Like I mentioned, I may not be able to realize this fully because on the first day there might be some obvious features (like from Zelda or Mario, for instance) that a gamer of any age would recognize. After I’m done with this StarTropics one, I’ll jump right into another and see how it goes.

One thing I would like to touch on today is making money online with your artwork. It’s something I’ve had difficulty with since I decided to become an artist. I say “difficulty” in two different regards; the actual means of making money with my artwork, as well as the feelings I have towards charging people. I would say I struggle equally with both of those, actually.

First off I think full blog transparency is very important to me. Don’t get me wrong though, I don’t go out of my way to be honest. I just don’t give it any thought when I start writing. The very last thing I want is for someone to pay me through my Patreon, and then realize later on that they wish they hadn’t because they read something I’ve written that changes their mind about me. I mean, I guess that situation could still occur, but I just want to make sure that people know as much about me as possible before they give me their money.

I know I think about it all the time when I help support someone. What if so-and-so isn’t as honest as I think they are. I give them my money, and what do they do with it? What if they don’t deserve my business? I want people to ask the same questions about me, and if they get in contact with me, or if they read what I’ve written about myself, I hope it could potentially put their mind at ease.

On the other hand, and I just talked a little about this yesterday, I have these negative feelings towards charging people for my efforts. I mean, over the past several months I’ve set up stores, and started a Patreon page, because that’s what artists are doing. I know I should feel okay with it too, so I’m just doing my best to give myself a chance at making a living in the business of creativity. I’m not really sure exactly where this gut feeling comes from, but I felt it most recently while I was writing my Patreon description where I basically ask for money to help support me, and it just feels dirty. I’m not doing anything wrong, not to my knowledge at least, but it just feels odd. I don’t like it.

Well, I think it could feel worse when I do make some sales, or when people do help support me. Like a guilty feeling maybe. I hope those that support me are easy enough to get into contact with so I can properly thank them. That should help put my mind at ease, at least. I mean, with the economic reality that we live in, people have to make money to survive. I’ve decided to become an artist full-time, and over the past few months I have been spending more and more time devoted to working on this, so I should be allowed to make a living, right?.

I don’t know, just thinking about it now I get this feeling that some agency I’ve never heard of will bust down my door and arrest me for trying to be happy. Or I’ll accidentally offend someone online and it’ll turn into a huge deal, ruining any chance of doing anything in the online marketplace. I’m not by any stretch a negative person when it comes to how I generally think (I would say I’m over positive no matter what the situation), but I do hope I can find some success and gain some confidence. I could probably then leave this little bit of negativity behind me for good.


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